February 13, 2010

Menstrual Misery

If the talk of periods embarrasses you, or offends you, then this is definitely one of those "TMI" posts (too much information!) - so please don't read this post, for my sake and yours.  Thanks :-) 

No really...you'll regret it...stop reading...

First, I have to vent a little to my female audience...
I've got so much to do, but I've been in bed all day. I thought I'd be productive by working on my blog while I wait for this Midol to kick into gear. I'll probably eat a little cube of 80% cacao too (any excuse).

I had my first "menstrual migraine" on Wednesday.  Today is Saturday.  I'm still in bed feeling like poo. For several days now I've had bowel issues, nausea, headaches, muscle tension, and dizziness, which consequently has made me quite fatigued.  (These things combined make it hard to pack for moving to the Queen & for Nicaragua).  I thought something was wrong, until I put two and two together...thanks, Momma...

Did you know that migraines can be caused by an oncoming period?  I just learned this...unfortunately.

I'm one of those lucky women who has major period symptoms.  I always get terrible cramps, but on occasion, I get diarrhea, vomiting, dizziness, and excruciating cramps that leave me curled up in a ball on the bed moaning all day.  It's terrible.

'Happened once to me in Guatemala (before I was married, so I was by myself, didn't know Spanish very well at the time, and panicked).  The lady of the house was so worried about me, and so sweet to me, but she was trying to make me drink some herbal tea.  I refused, she insisted, I drank it, and then puked...

Okay, one more story!
Another time in Guatemala (this last June - now married), I had some kind of virus and the lady of that house was a nurse.  She came into our room early that morning with a big glass of hot tea.
"This is really nasty," she said, "but it'll kill whatever you have..."
"Thanks," I say reluctantly.
She stands there staring at me...I'm starting to feel awkward...
"Well, drink it," she says.
"Uh..." I say, "What's in it?"
She starts on a long list that includes stuff like:
 "garlic," "chamomile," "honey," "wormwood..." etc.
"Drink it.  Drink it all.  Be a woman, be strong.  
It's nasty, but it's good for you.  Drink it!"
"Uh..." is all I can mutter.  "I'll drink it, but not now," I manage to spit out.  
She looks at me suspiciously...
"I promise," I go on to say.
"Okay," she smiles and leaves the room.
"Oh maaaan...I promised!?!?  What were you thinking, Em?!?"  
(I have a strong conscience).

about 20 minutes later...I sip the "tea"...YUCK!!!  Do you know what wormwood tastes like?  It is so bitter bitter bitter.  Here's a Bible passage for ya (Proverbs 5:3&4):

3For the lips of an adulteress drip honey
         And smoother than oil is her speech;
4But in the end she is bitter as wormwood,
         Sharp as a two-edged sword."

Anyway.  I plugged my nose, drank a big gulp, gagged profusely, drank some more, gagged and complained...then Tedd said it couldn't be that bad, I handed him the glass, he sips and makes a priceless face, and I set the garlic/wormwood tea aside for "later."  Needless to say, I didn't finish it, but I managed to get two-thirds of it down & I don't think it helped, but who knows, I can't remember; it was traumatic for my taste buds.

The end.
I feel better now.  Time to pack.  Thanks for letting me talk about my poor wittle self...


  1. I can sympathize-perhaps not as excruciatingly. Feelin' for you, sister! Hope your trip is blessed!

    Abigail @ Pearls and Diamonds

  2. I feel for you. i have gotten migraines since i was 10, and guess what else i got at 10? Yup! Auntie Flo come a callin. i get them for days before, and for days after.
    Tea is actually good for you, even though it makes you puke, the more you can drink the better. Drink it cold or hot, with sweetener, milk, honey, agave, or plain. it contains caffeine, which acts as an anethestic with your midol. The tea also contains electrolytes, which your body needs.
    So give the tea another shot, but try a brand you like, rather than one someone concocted. I keep a gallon of strong, plain, and dark tea in my fridge. =)


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