December 15, 2010

The Nicaraguan ABCs: P is for...

Pregnancy

preggo in Nicaragua (22 weeks)

Did you think I'd forgotten about my Nica posts??  Well, in some ways I had put it on the back-burner as things back in the USA have picked up, but I didn't forget!  In fact, I'm actually glad that I still have to finish, because its something that helps me remember and process.  This "series" has been good for me, helping me to articulate the experiences we had and to treasure the small things.

(And boy do I still miss our puppy dogs!)

Ahem.  So.  P is for Pregnancy. (and for personal?  I think I'll get personal here.)

Tedd & I had a miscarriage in July 2009.  It could have been a million things.  Scientifically speaking, and contrary to popular belief, it's rarely caused by outside sources (ie. something the mother did), but we can't help but think it happened because I was sick very shortly after the baby was conceived...a rough virus I had in Guatemala.
Tedd & I finding out we were pregnant with our first; two days before miscarriage

For about two years, a big reason we waited to have children is because traveling got in the way.  Vaccinations, malaria meds, and important trips meant wait. wait. wait.  I believed that it was God's way of giving us the yield sign, but at times I would start to resent the connection between traveling and waiting (not to mention the possible connection between travel and miscarriage).

So naturally there were some fears involved when we decided that Nicaragua wasn't gonna hold us back ;-)  What about the water?  What about traveling on a motorcycle?  What about the heat and the discomforts of domestic life?  What about the potential threat of malaria or dengue?  What about...what about...what about?

Well, dang-it, those are just some things we'll have to face, just like all the other women in Nicaragua, and like all the other foreigners who are having babies in other countries.  We'll just have to trust the Lord and that He'll take care of it if it's His will for us.  And FINALLY, after a year of postponing (following the miscarriage), we started to try again.  

I experienced a number of emotions when it came to getting pregnant in a foreign (and 3rd-world) country.  I went from resenting all its set-backs, to embracing the new trust and dependence on God that formed as a result of both waiting and His answering our prayer for a child.  

Nicaragua will be a special place in our hearts forever.  
It's where I received a very unexpected negative blood test, 
it's where I cried out to God for a child, 
it's where we were humbled to ask others to join us in prayer for fertility...

it's where God was kind and merciful and heard our prayer.  

It's where Ian was conceived and taken care of as he formed in my womb when I had so many fears threatening my trust in God.  

It's where I didn't get malaria, or dengue, or parasites, or into a motorcycle accident, or overwhelmed by the discomforts of domestic life...

God took amazing care of us in Nicaragua.  Being pregnant there taught me a lot, and as I remember all my fear-driven prayers for health and peace and comfort and a successful pregnancy, I see that God was there and working on my heart.

And next...is for Quesillos
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